how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize
