people are starting to question the shark bite story
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
