Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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