Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
