a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
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