gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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