I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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