Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
