Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
so let's talk penis.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
