I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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