To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
