I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
