So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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