Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
