The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
