I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
