Porn is love you can see.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
