I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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