what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
operation have a gay friend backfired
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
