Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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