Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
