Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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