She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
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