i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Randomize
