So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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