I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Randomize
