i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize