I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
