Whod you bang
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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