He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
