I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
