I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
