i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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