So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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