grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Randomize
