My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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