Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
