I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Randomize
