I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
