Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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