My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
PANTIES FOUND
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
