You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
