I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
