Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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