I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
