At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
