where am i from again
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
