it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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