Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
