ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
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